Twinkie

Although restoring the Countess does not seem to be a popular choice, I'm having a hard time understanding why anyone would care what Trevor and I choose to do with our time. I can't tell you how many people have stopped to talk to me about it; some excited and happy, and most very judgemental and rude. The judgy people seem to feel very strongly about it.

And that's what I don't get. WHY DO YOU CARE? Leave me alone! My choice to restore the camper does not affect you. Don't patronize me, don't tell me it's pointless, don't make fun of me. Just walk away and live your own life.

Trust me, I'm used to people judging me, but it's never been this blatant before. Friends and family, if you are reading this and you have an opinion about this trailer, please keep it to yourself. Not to be rude, but it is none of your business!

Time for a new blog post...

Phoebe had a Lego robotics competition this last week! It was fun to see her feel good about something that only she was involved in. She really was proud. I think her team did a great job too!

The kids and I redid the front flower bed this week as well. We really only shaped it, weeded it, and then planted a few things.

Also, if you are in the market for some asparagus,  it's that time of year! We picked a bunch this week and gave it out to friends and family. Let me know...

The weather has been so wonderful lately. The wind has been blowing, but ya gotta just look past it and feel the sun on your face.

Today Logan was one of the youth speakers. He gave a talk on Obedience. Kinda fitting if you know that Logan has been struggling with that for a while now. He really worked hard on getting a talk written. I worry about Logan's speach. It was very noticeable when he was talking. Maybe I'm used to it in normal life, but today, his lisp was very prominent. I did ask a school counselor for an assessment a while ago, and when they came to observe him in class, he was able to hide it by talking very fast. He says his S's really quickly and a very short touch on them. Most people don't notice it. He is good at hiding his problems. Kind of like when we got his hearing assessed, and after failing the test in both ears, and then passing in both ears, the doctor asked him if he ever has problems with his ears, and he said no. That's totally not true. He has constant, really fast onset ear aches ALL THE TIME!! He has lots of head aches too. Also, his hearing comes and goes. Too bad the ENT doctor cleared his health and declared him a normal boy. Ugh. That was frustrating.

So let's move to another topic. The trailer is almost all stripped of its mossy green paint. I'm about ready to polish her up. She'll be so pretty as a shiny girl. This week, Samantha asked me why our trailer is a VAMPIRE. What? Where did that come from? It's because it's a Streamline Countess. Well, The Count on Sesame Street is a vampire apparently,  (according to her) and also, Logan said. I had to explain to her that a Count and Countess were titles given to royalty, and not vampires. Except, I just looked it up, and it's actually EARL and Countess that go together. Where does Count come from? But this brings up a really good question: Is The Count on Sesame Street really a vampire? I guess I never really thought about it.

About that thing called Countess

Our new trailer is a 1971 Streamline Countess, 27 feet long. It looks like an old Airstream, but is a different brand. The story goes that two designer guys for Airstream had a falling out with Airstream over the design of the trailers. They split off and formed their own company. Shortly after that, the two men then had a falling out with each other and split one more time, forming a second split-off company from airstream. Therefore, there are a bunch of old trailers that look like Airstreams floating around out there.

Currently, I'm trying to title it, but no one seems to know where the title went off to. I'll get it sooner or later. After we get the title, we've got some work to do.  That's all I'm gonna say about that.

Meanwhile, did you know that oven cleaner makes a good paint stripper? Yep.

So there ya go.

Healing

Hello everyone. I took a break. I know it's pretty obvious at this point. Lol.

Here's the deal, I felt like I was drowning in expectations. Not just the obvious expectations I put on myself, but in the expectations of other people. I'm still struggling with that, and maybe I always will, but after moving into our house finally, I just needed a break, and felt like disappearing was the only way to take it.

Anyway, I'm still taking a break from things, but I feel like it's time to pick the ol' blog back up.

So what have we been doing these past few months? We've been building more things in the house, and painting, and I've had some time to take a few breaths and put myself back on the healthy track.

A lot of things have happened. We got a new old car, Sami had a birthday, we got a free old camping trailer, we've settled into a new rhythm at the new house. Carter can read now and Will is almost bigger than him. All the kids are thriving and so much happier.

As the dust has settled, I've found that I don't know how to settle now. I'm trying really hard to relax and enjoy this time, but I still find myself looking for projects every day.

I've recently taught myself how to screen print. Lol. Really. I know how to burn screens and all that jazz. Pretty dang exciting.

Still, there are people who don't understand. I don't know how to explain it without actually going into details that would give away who they are, in case they read this. I'm talking about people here in Gooding. Sometimes small town living isn't ideal, even though most days I absolutely love it. So yeah, healing and wanting space. That's what I'm all about right now.

Hitting Rock Bottom

You'd think that moving into the house would have solved any and all of our problems, but moving into the house made our lives much more complicated.

After moving in, we had the huge task of packing and moving all while living our regular lives. We couldn't find anything once it was put at the new house, because there was nowhere to unpack it and put it away. Not having a master closet has made it difficult to find clothes. Not having a second bathroom made it difficult to sleep at night, because kids would be tramping through our bedroom at two in the morning. Trying to find tools to continue building has been difficult, because the tools are no longer easily accessible and are not organized among the boxes and car tools that have been stacked out in the little house. Everything has become so much harder.

Since moving in, Trevor dug up the pipe outside, and found the clog. We replaced twenty-seven feet of sewer pipe, and let me tell you... it was a smelly job.

We mudded, taped, textured and carpeted the basement, and finished the stairwell mostly.

We have blinds.

I built a coffee table out of old wood, Trevor moved a light in the living room, we painted window trim, and did a bunch of little jobs here and there.

We still don't have insulation in the attic, which makes for a hot sleep for the girls in the basement. The upstairs is chilly, and the basement is a sauna. Also, no closet, no doors downstairs, and really a lot of projects to finish still.

How all of this sounds to you, I don't care. You can think I'm complaining, or not (I'm not). I think it's going to take a long time for us to come back together and heal as a family. We became so broken during the last few years. It was hard sacrificing so much for this house, even relationships. We've got a long road ahead of us and have been taking some really good steps towards healing. I recently took a parenting class that helped me a lot, even with my relationship with Trevor. lol. I realize I'm not his parent, but the class was very insightful with helping me look at relationships differently.

Now that the bulk of the building and the main push to finish things is over, we can begin to take the steps we need to move on.

Maybe this whole post sounds dramatic to you. I don't care. I will tell you this though: If you are someone who thinks I'm over-dramatizing this, and you wonder what I do or have done with my days, just know that you have judged me wrongly, have no idea what you are talking about, and can go take a flying leap off a tall building. lol. But seriously. GO. I don't need or want judgement in my life.