back to school!

It was a sad day at my house today. Logan and Samantha went to school. Logan is now in Second Grade, and Sami is in Kindergarten. It felt weird. Phoebe was lost without them, and to tell you the truth so was I. I love my kids. 

Samantha loved her first day. I walked her into school and stopped at the door of her classroom where her teacher was waiting. She took her teacher's hand and didn't look back. Sad. I can't help but want to hold on to her, but I'm glad she was so confident. She did nothing but chatter on and on about everything when we picked her up later today. She met the Principal, she played animals in the gym, she had recess, made a few friends and one little boy cried all day long.

Logan is loving his new teacher so he says. I walked him into school today, and then he walked himself to his room. Now that was sad. He's not so little anymore. Logan made a few new friends which is a very good thing. We're hoping last school year's friends will be forgotten since they were such a bad influence on him. They do tend to make friends with the kids in their classroom, so PLEASE let there only be good little boys this year! Here's hoping. Oh and Logan starts soccer tomorrow! I have no idea what he's supposed to wear. I never played soccer. He got soccer as a birthday gift (something he's wanted to do for years!). I don't think he has tennis shoes that fit, and that may be a slight problem. They don't have to wear pads or anything like that, right? No special cleats or anything? I hope not. Logan's primary teacher is his coach, and let me tell you HE IS EXCITED! I guess we'll see at practice tomorrow. This should be interesting!

I took all my kids out a little over a week ago to take their "back to school" pictures. I ended up taking the pictures at the temple, even though that wasn't my intention. As I was passing the temple, on a whim, I pulled into the parking lot. The sun was in the perfect position and the lighting was so beautiful that evening. I think they turned out even better than I could have hoped. Unfortunately I found out that Phoebe is fighting PKS (photographer's kid syndrome) pretty bad. And sadly I know that Logan will always have it because of how I learned on him. I wasn't always patient with him, and his smile is always forced. Poor Logan. Don't tell him I told you this, but he worries so much about his smile looking real, I've caught him practicing his smile in the mirror. LOL! If I tell him not to smile he gets even more self conscious about it. So I've decided it's best not to say anything to him for now. Pretty much I'm just a bad, mean mom. I ruined Logan. I'm sure it will pass with Phoebe just like it did with Samantha, but it makes me sad about Logan. I hope Phoebe's real smile returns soon. 

Now I know you'll be looking, so I'll label Phoebe's real smile. Otherwise she's faking.

 Real smiles all around

 Real smile FYI

 Real smile here too!

Still running. Not eating so wonderfully, but not eating terrible either. Coming down the home stretch. Go me!

Wow

I think I need some words of encouragement. Like when is life going to get better? When will we have more money? And I'm not thinking I need to be like everyone in my ward. I'd like to be in a place where I'm not hyperventilating when I pay the bills every month some day. I'd like to never have to walk into the Medicaid office or Central District Health ever again. And I am getting so tired of all the new families moving into the ward to rent a place, fresh from school, and then a year later building a beautiful new house.

So yes, I'm totally sinning here. But, when is it going to be our turn to be able to take the next step in life? To be able to move on? I'm not saying I want to build a new house, but I'll take an old crappy house. Couldn't an anonymous donor please send me a check in the mail so I can pay off my loans and start saving for a house? I don't need much. Just a few thousand. Maybe a little more than a few. 

LOL! I live in a dream world. 

Funny Story...

Today Logan fasted for the first time. He and Trevor were fasting for a variety of reasons. But anyway, it may have possibly been a bad idea to only eat salads last night for dinner. Probably not enough food there to keep them going today.

Around 11:00 a.m. Logan came into my room where I was resting and playing a game on the phone, and he lay down next to me and started sobbing about how hungry he was. I just held him and said I was sorry and how it wasn't supposed to be easy to fast and wasn't he glad he was only fasting for two meals? Poor kid.

So I said "why don't you get a book and read, or if you are tired you should take a nap. That will take your mind off of food." So he came back to my bed and lay next to me reading until he fell asleep around noon. I should mention that 1. It is Phoebe's birthday today and the girls and I had DOUGHNUTS for breakfast 2. Logan's face was white as a ghost 3. Trevor was gone home teaching.

About 15 minutes after falling asleep, Logan sat up and said "I don't feel very good" and then put his hand over his mouth and spewed puke through every finger gap all over the room. I really think that's the messiest throw up I've ever seen. You should never put your hand over your mouth to throw up. It creates a huge amount of pressure and force.

I ran to grab a bowl for the puke to go into, but Logan ran to the bathroom instead, dripping puke all over the carpet. sigh. While in the bathroom, he spewed a few more times until he felt better. After that, I sent him to his bed with a bowl while I cleaned everything up. Sigh again. Laundry all day.

After cleaning the whole mess up, I went to talk to Logan. I asked him if he still wanted to keep fasting. He said he did. I gave him a little bit of water and a half of a piece of bread. I told him that this water and bread were like his medicine. I told him it was okay to take medicine while fasting. I told him his body was having a hard time without any food, so he needed to have just a little bit to make his tummy feel better. I told him to eat only as much as he thought he needed.

I went back a few minutes later to check on him and he had only eaten half of the half. He said he didn't need any more. Sweet boy.

He made it all the way until dinner time. That's FIVE O'CLOCK!!!! I am so proud of Logan! And then of course, he got a doughnut with his dinner to make up for breakfast. And cake and ice cream later tonight for the birthday party, but that's another post.

Why has everyone in blog land deserted?

Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello?

Anybody there? Anybody there? Anybody there? Anybody there? 

Seriously, where has everybody gone? Does anyone blog still? Has everyone deserted for Facebook? Maybe I shouldn't go there, but I'm going to. I HATE Facebook. For me, it's no good. I'm not saying it's bad for everyone, but definitely it's bad for me. I spent way too much time looking at people's profiles and wandering around looking people up and seriously before I knew it, I'd wasted hours! I have no self control. And so, I'm now banned from going on there. I banned myself. I'm cool like that.

Also, the biggest problem I had was reading about what the people in my ward were doing. Seeing pictures and hearing about them all hanging out was super depressing. It's not like I was invited. I felt horrible about myself. Not cool. I know, you might say that maybe it's my lack of self control and because I have no self esteem that I don't get along with Facebook, and you'd be 100% right. Which is why I'm not on there anymore. I feel so much better about myself now. I have more time to spend with my kids, clean the house, get stuff done. It's better for me.

To each his own I guess. But still, COME BACK YOU GUYS!!!!!