Phoebe is now 18 months. Do you KNOW what that makes me feel? GUILTY! Guilty that there is no baby on the way yet. Probably because we have had a baby with us at church now for the past three years solid. For a few months we had two. That was crazy. But back to the topic. No baby. I only slightly feel guilty. I only slightly feel like it is going to have to be one of those things that just happens. Cause otherwise we will put it off as long as possible. Having another baby, I mean.

Not that it is anyone's business when or if we have another one. But don't you just love being able to see into my thoughts every now and then?

I know its been a while since I've posted some real pictures, so here are a few from the last couple days.

This was Logan's idea for me to take a picture of him. Sami and Phoebe wanted in on the picture too.

We had a lot of snow, so I let the two oldest go outside. Phoebe was upset and wanted to go out and play. She stood at the door watching them the whole time.
She wants to go out, Logan wants to come in.
Sami shows me her gloves.
and her boots.
Logan rolls his pant legs up because they are wet.
I love little hands and feet
again. Am I obsessed?
A typical Samantha look.
Showing me her band-aid.
Phoebe playing with Logan's salamanders.
Whoever can guess whose eye this is is better than me.

I have a question for all my friends who are married to lawyers or who know a lawyer. I have a theory I would like to run by you.

As an attorney practices law and the years go by, would you agree that the attorney gets more and more full of himself? Wait that makes no sense. Let me start over.

I know an attorney who has been practicing law for about 10 years. Is he nice? no. Actually he is pretty much a jerk. I know another attorney who has been practicing for over 3o years. He is not only a jerk, but superbly rude and grouchy. So I ask you. Would you say that with each year that goes by, the Lawyer gets more and more arrogant and cocky and rude?

This has absolutely nothing to do with Trevor. I think Trevor is nice. I love Trevor. I think Trevor is one of the friendliest attorneys I know. But I'm not biased. I do feel a bit worried that rudeness and arrogance might someday get a hold on him...maybe. Or not. I don't know. Anyone?

I'm so confused.

I wanna make that!

I'm going to show you how to make this bag. I don't know how yet, but I'll figure it out and let you know.

I am on day three of green smoothies. I keep making the same recipe over and over because I am afraid to try something new and have it taste nasty. I put in a few handfuls of spinach, one handful frozen strawberries, one squirt agave nectar and two spoonfuls of plain yogurt. It tastes like an okay strawberry shake. I have one for breakfast, and one for snack late in the day. I eat real food too. Don't worry Mom.

I really want to feel healthier and more energetic. SO far, I feel the same. I'll post pictures tomorrow. Samantha does not like them. Logan says they taste good, but I think he is just being nice.

My sister Laura and I are doing this ridiculous weight loss challenge (sorry Laura, but it is ridiculous!) where we have to reach specific weights by April 11. I think it is ridiculous because we both set unobtainable weights for ourselves. Not really unobtainable, but we will be skeletons if we reach our goals. According to Green Smoothie Girl, these weights are totally doable. We will see. Anyway, if you haven't tried a smoothie, I totally recommend it! It's a good way to get more fruits & veggies in your diet.

Super Long Night

I thought we were over being sick, that is until I felt a tickle in my throat and knew it was about to start all over again. I guess hand sanitizer doesn't work so well when you have a baby in the house that puts EVERYTHING in their mouth and doesn't know how to cover her mouth when she sneezes or coughs!!

Last night I was up all night with Samantha. It was a very scary night. She woke up gasping for breath. I ran in her room and grabbed her out of bed. I lifted up her shirt and checked her breathing which was very labored and you could count every rib as she breathed in and out. It was very reminiscent of when Logan had RSV as a baby. Luckily we have a nebulizer so I grabbed it and hooked everything up. I think she must have croup because she kept coughing and it sure sounded like we had a dog in the room.

I gave her two treatments, but she was still having a really hard time breathing and she was freaking out. We bundled up in our coats and blankets and went outside and sat on the porch. After about 20 minutes things were really sounding better so we came back inside and watched The Little Rascals until we fell asleep on the couch together.

Where was Trevor this whole time you ask? ASLEEP! I tried to wake him up, but he sleeps so soundly it is a wasted effort to even try.

I am off facebook. Just so you know. I have noticed that the trend is going away from blogging and moving towards facebook. I don't have the time for both, so I needed to make a decision. This is it.

For 2011, I am going to try to move the focus of my blog more towards bettering myself and my family. I want to be more positive and inventive. Yeah, that means there are going to be more creative things on here like there used to be. I'm not really sure myself what that completely means, but I guess we'll all see in the coming weeks.

My goal is also to do stuff on here that I've never done and also to put myself out there on a whole new creative level. Oh, do I have you yet? You'll be able to make fun of me like never before! (Remember when I made shoes for Samantha? OH OH or the botched blessing dress!!) haha! Ah those are good memories.

I can't wait to see what is in store for us all!

I was talking to someone tonight who was a total breath of fresh air. She is someone who everyone wants to be around because she makes everyone feel like they are important. She is very positive and yet full of quirks and doesn't care who sees that she is not perfect. I love people like this. I aspire to be like this.

It is hard for me to feel safe around certain people so I become quiet and observe in social situations where I don't feel like I belong. Upon further examination, the people that I feel uncomfortable around are people who seem perfect to me. They are not real. Especially not warm. I guess it could be misconstrued for me being arrogant and a snob when I become quiet, but really I am just uncomfortable with fake-ness.

Why do some people feel the need to present a perfect demeanor. We all know that no one is perfect. Also, I feel uncomfortable with fake caring. You know, the kind of caring that is just there to look good. They ask a question, but don't really listen to the answer.

Sister So-And-So: "Alyson, you've been pretty quiet lately. Is everything okay?"

Alyson: "Well, actually I have been having a hard time..."

Sister Fun Stuff walks in.

Sister So-And-So: {interrupting Alyson} "Hi Sister Fun Stuff! I missed seeing you at charades last night!"

Anyway, this lady tonight reminded me that we don't have to be perfect to be liked. We don't have to have perfectly coiffed hair and designer jeans from The Buckle to be considered for a friend. All we have to do is be true to who we are and not be afraid to be ourselves.